Decision making: Arrrghhhh

Do you go back and forth between options, analyzing, over-analyzing them? Do you feel that you have finally decided to go with one option and at the very next moment decide to chuck it, because someone convinced you to do otherwise? Do you talk to a lot of people about it and end up feeling confused and frustrated?

Well, then you will understand what I go through very often. I reallllly need to learn to decide.

Decision making has never come easy to me. I am fickle. I over-think. I over-analyse. I am not necessarily the kind of person who needs to go with the best option. I will be content if my criteria are met. But, then the problem lies in deciding those criteria. In deciding which one I prefer over the other. At various points different criteria seem more important. 

Currently, I am facing a couple of such decision making problems. I am in the middle of deciding whether I should go for a single occupancy room or a double occupancy room in a 2BHK in Mumbai. Its a decision hinging upon my preference for privacy and peace of mind over potential money saving. (There are a variety of other criteria which make me tilt from one side to another).

Some things I have learnt from my past experience:

1. I have realized the final decision is always on me and I can decide to do what I want if I really wish to, of course might have to put some more effort into it. 

2. More the number of people you ask, more is the confusion. Of course, this doesn't mean you don't ask anyone. Do ask people but only those who will completely understand your situation and are known to make rational, sound decisions and more importantly people you trust. Also, do ask people who will directly get affected by your decisions (don't forget your parents!)

3. Give a deadline to yourself and decide by then, come what may.

4. Once decided, do not regret if it goes wrong. Work to make it right, adjust. No point thinking what if you had taken the other option. Always remember - whatever happens, happens for the best.

5. Go with your gut. More often than not its right.

So now, I am gonna use my fundae to solve my problem.

Chalo happy decision making! (I know its never happy >.<, but still...)

Looking back at IIM C..

What did I gain from the past two years? Was the MBA worth it?
I don't have a clear cut answer, but I'll let you decide when I finish.

I joined IIM Calcutta as a fresher. In my previous post, My journey so far, I had mentioned about the life at Joka after a good 7 months into the MBA program. But I feel, there is much more to add to it after the completion of the program. Trust me there is a lot and this post may not do justice to it but I will try to cover as much as I can or till I till I get bored, whichever is earlier (Both cases, you will surely get bored bwhahaha :D)

As I mentioned in the earlier post, that campus life here is quite different from the undergrad one. Reasons being simple - people here are more focused as to what they want from here (or at least pretend to be). It's a much diverse set of people (Yes, engineers dominate and girls are few (It's IIM C)), by diversity I mean the age difference, the work experience, international exposure etc. This makes you act in a certain way. It forces you to try to fit in, and when people do that, they need to change. I will speak for myself from now on. After two years, I feel I am a new person altogether. If you ask my BITS friends to describe me using five adjectives and compare the same with IIMC friends, I am quite sure, they won't match - in fact some might even be opposites (I should probably do this). Of course, the core me is still the same - that's never going to change.

So how have I changed and why? I am outgoing, confident, comfortable around new people, hardly do not take time to open up. These are some qualities almost everyone develops here (at least applies to freshers) There might be multiple reasons for this - firstly, there was a conscious effort from my side to bring about this change plus its a pretty important. The culture is such. You interact a lot more with seniors, take their help for    placement prep,you work in teams for every project, you work in clubs etc. Dramatics was a big contributor for this change, it was something new for me. However bad or good the actor I may be it still gave me the confidence that I can go onto a stage and speak rehearsed lines in a certain manner without being boo-ed. It was a great confidence booster. The international exposure (no, it isn't just another jargon) helped a great deal. I went to Hong Kong for my intern and then traveled around Europe for a term as a part of a student exchange program. The experience has added new dimensions to my thinking. Has made me far more confident that I can deal with new situations, new people and manage on my own.

There are changes which I did not envisage. Changes, which I want to change back.  I have become lazier(!), impatient, leave-it-to-the-last-minute sort of person. I wasn't like this before. I do understand, campus life makes people lazy etc. but its relative, sometimes I feel I have become lazier than most people around me. I have become disorganized and have developed a do-not-give-a-damn-attitude. Things I will consciously try to change going forward.

With these thoughts, I now embark upon a new journey - a completely different one. I have numerous hopes and aspirations from myself and the world around me. Lets see how it goes :)

All the best to all the people embarking on a new journey!

Random Musings

I wonder how many blogposts have this as their title. Leave alone posts, there will a  handful of blogs named Random Musings. And I don't have a point. It was just a random musing.

Simple yet profound

I asked him it's been so long, do you still love her? Do you still feel the same way?

He said, "I don't know if I still love her. It may not be the same. But I know one thing, I feel happy when I talk to her:"

It was the most simple answer and yet I got to know everything I wanted to. Love is too simple yet we make it so complicated. :)

Maslow, you made me think!

So, I was in Goa last week. Yes Goa, for a vacation. Yes, with friends. And now you can go green with envy :D. I just love Goa, I have spent 4 best years of my life there and I am still head over heels in love with it. Actually, probably its not Goa, its the sea, the beach, the sand, the waves, the sun, the stars, the wind and all of it together with friends which makes me go week in my knees. Recreate this setting anywhere and I will be as satisfied as a well-fed puppy. Oh, and this reminds me what I really intended to write about. Most All of my MBA friends would have read about the famous Maslow's theory of needs and all most wouldn't remember it, not all the stages at least. Frankly, even I didn't. But now I have read about it in-depth. And you'll ask me why especially since BS is the least read/remembered/bothered about course in the whole of MBA.I'll tell you why 

Lets rewind to last week.

Place: Vagator Beach (the secluded part)

Time: Twilight. Just post sunset

Date: Don't really care

Scene: The wind was blowing hard and ruthlessly. The tides in the sea were so haphazard it felt like it was playfully teasing me and following wherever I went. The sun had left the scene, leaving behind a sky so pink, you'd wonder if God was gay. The stars were already all over the sky. And, of course, how could I forget the cashew-like moon glowing proudly as if it had reclaimed its kingdom back from the sun. (Fyi: Cashew's a Goan specialty, if you didn't know already). The sand was blowing in all directions, a thin film was deposited on our bodies. I apologize for going too much into detail and hence taking time to come to the point, but trust me, its essential. Unless you can feel even a bit like how I felt that day, you will not be able to appreciate my new found respect in theories far left behind. I forgot to mention my second love - my music (First love being beaches if it isn't so clear yet) We were an assortment of five friends; and I say assortment because each one of us is so very different and were especially in a very different thought sphere. In the midst of all this, I felt like I am the most satisfied person on earth. No worry in the world. In fact, I remember my mind was clear, empty, devoid of any thought or feeling, when I was walking along the shoreline with my phone and just one line playing repeatedly on my mind - Look at the stars, look how they shine for you. (Yellow by Coldplay). This is surprising because it rarely happens with me. I am a thinker, I cannot stop thinking no matter how hard I try. I find it difficult to sleep immediately as I lie on my bed however tired I am, since my brain doesn't just let me! Anyway, so as learned men say, I was in a state of meditation. That's when I remembered the self-actualization stage - the fifth stage in the Maslow's hierarchy of needs. (Yes, I eventually started thinking) I couldn't feel hunger or cold (though I should have!) I did not feel scared of the waves. I did not bother how late it had  become. Moreover I did not care, what xyz thought about me or what my friends were upto. It was all pointless. I just wanted to be with me. Do nothing. This was self-actualization state for me. Or possibly a step ahead, if there's  even something above that! 

Maslow says, only when your needs in the earlier stages, namely, physiological,  safety, belonging, esteem are met, you can reach the last stage of self-actualization. It surely didn't go that way for me. It can be argued that none of these things, I was in dire need of. I had had a meal sometime in the morning, I was wearing clothes, not enough to guard me well but surely I wasn't shivering in cold. I did not care about people, because they were my friends and hence I could feel the way I felt. But, there have been numerous saints in our Indian history who have been able to rise over all this. So its not impossible. Maybe there's more to it than the theory so simply narrated to us.

Even though it seems like, I am confused, I am actually happy about the fact that yes, its possible to rise beyond certain things or people and feel absolutely light even when there are thousand problems around you. :)

PS: Do listen to Yellow - Coldplay. Its soothing.

Europe ne humse kya kya karwaya!

Apne hi ghar mein hotel ki tarah rehna sikhaya
Ek pair hostel mein toh dusra train mein rakhke chalna sikhaya
Rail gadiyon ko apna dusra ghar banwaya
Eurail ki kimat se sau dafa zyada vasool karwaya
Ek hi mahine mein usko do hisse mein batwaya
College ke zero attendance ka sau pratishat upyog karwaya

Europe ne humse kya kya karwaya!

Gujju hone ka pehli baar asli ehsaas karvaya
Grocery shopping ke liye Belgium se Germany jane pe majboor kiya
Coke ki kimat se PPP ka andaza lagwaya
Snickers aur Twix se pet bharwaya
Scandi mein lutero se bhi lutna sikhaya
Lidl aur Adle ki khoj mein raah-raah bhatkaya
Daru se bhi mehenga pani dilwaya

Europe ne humse kya kya karwaya!

Ek shaher se dusre shaher mein antar karna bhulaya
Town hall, castle, bridge aur cathedral mein kabhi na jane ka pran dilwaya
Chala chala ke juton ke taliye ghiswaye
Starbucks aur McD ke wifi ke liye naya pyar jagaya
Facebook se badhkar google maps ka istemaal karwaya

Europe ne humse kya kya karwaya!

Itni samanta mein bhi har ek shahar ki ek anokhi pehchaan karvayi
Apne itihaas, kalakaari, pakwaan aur bhasha se dil ko lubhaya
Inki takniki vikas aur jivanstar ne ascharyachakit kiya
Anjaan logon ki bewajah parwaah pe sharminda karwaya
Kuch naye dost aur unki dosti ka pyara anubhav karvaya

Europe ne humse bahut kuch karwaya!

Rail ke lambe safar mein hamein bhi kavi ban ne par majboor kiya

Europe ne humse kya kya karwaya!

Travelling, the real way!

An nice article by Paulo Coelho:

I realised very early on that, for me, travelling was the best way of learning. I still have a pilgrim soul, and I thought that I would use this blog to pass on some of the lessons I have learned, in the hope that they might prove useful to other pilgrims like me. 

1. Avoid museums. This might seem to be absurd advice, but let’s just think about it a little: if you are in a foreign city, isn’t it far more interesting to go in search of the present than of the past? It’s just that people feel obliged to go to museums because they learned as children that travelling was about seeking out that kind of culture. Obviously museums are important, but they require time and objectivity – you need to know what you want to see there, otherwise you will leave with a sense of having seen a few really fundamental things, except that you can’t remember what they were.

2. Hang out in bars. Bars are the places where life in the city reveals itself, not in museums. By bars I don’t mean nightclubs, but the places where ordinary people go, have a drink, ponder the weather, and are always ready for a chat. Buy a newspaper and enjoy the ebb and flow of people. If someone strikes up a conversation, however silly, join in: you cannot judge the beauty of a particular path just by looking at the gate.

3. Be open. The best tour guide is someone who lives in the place, knows everything about it, is proud of his or her city, but does not work for any agency. Go out into the street, choose the person you want to talk to, and ask them something (Where is the cathedral? Where is the post office?). If nothing comes of it, try someone else – I guarantee that at the end of the day you will have found yourself an excellent companion.

4. Try to travel alone or – if you are married – with your spouse. It will be harder work, no one will be there taking care of you, but only in this way can you truly leave your own country behind. Traveling with a group is a way of being in a foreign country while speaking your mother tongue, doing whatever the leader of the flock tells you to do, and taking more interest in group gossip than in the place you are visiting.

5. Don’t compare. Don’t compare anything – prices, standards of hygiene, quality of life, means of transport, nothing! You are not traveling in order to prove that you have a better life than other people – your aim is to find out how other people live, what they can teach you, how they deal with reality and with the extraordinary.

6. Understand that everyone understands you. Even if you don’t speak the language, don’t be afraid: I’ve been in lots of places where I could not communicate with words at all, and I always found support, guidance, useful advice, and even girlfriends. Some people think that if they travel alone, they will set off down the street and be lost for ever. Just make sure you have the hotel card in your pocket and – if the worst comes to the worst – flag down a taxi and show the card to the driver.

7. Don’t buy too much. Spend your money on things you won’t need to carry: tickets to a good play, restaurants, trips. Nowadays, with the global economy and the Internet, you can buy anything you want without having to pay excess baggage.

8. Don’t try to see the world in a month. It is far better to stay in a city for four or five days than to visit five cities in a week. A city is like a capricious woman: she takes time to be seduced and to reveal herself completely.

9. A journey is an adventure. Henry Miller used to say that it is far more important to discover a church that no one else has ever heard of than to go to Rome and feel obliged to visit the Sistine Chapel with two hundred thousand other tourists bellowing in your ear. By all means go to the Sistine Chapel, but wander the streets too, explore alleyways, experience the freedom of looking for something – quite what you don’t know – but which, if you find it, will – you can be sure – change your life.